Month: May 2020

Have you ever felt so disappointed with yourself or just life in general that the feeling is hard to shake? I feel like I’ve been in one of those seasons. So mentally and emotionally drained how could I possibly compete with a time of life when I felt strong and confident. I long to be her once again, to run and just keep running. But now I’m just out of gas, my pace has slowed from running to a crawl. Accepting my new pace has been one of the biggest hurtles I’ve had to face.

So there I am in the shower crying, sweat running down my face. I just got back from a run it was hard, it was disappointing. What once lite a fire in me only seems to remind me of what I’ve lost. A dream, a destiny, a hope maybe. I remember a time when running made me feel better and now it only reminds me of how I once was better. Better mentally, emotionally, physically. Have you ever felt like you’ve taken 12 steps back or maybe 20 or 200? That’s pretty much how I’ve been feeling. Not wanting to accept where I’m at right now, not allowing myself to be ok with my new normal.

So as I’m crying in the shower I heard God, “What would your brother tell you right now?” I stop to think. I reply, ” He would tell me not to focus on other peoples race or how fast my pace but just to stay in the race.” On that note God began to encourage me. He told me that yesterday’s pace wasn’t today’s grace. In other words, with each season of life comes a grace. A grace that gives you the strength to face the challenges it brings. And with each season that grace looks different. My grace for this season of my life is a slower pace then it once was, maybe last seasons was running and this one is walking. Whatever the pace, I need to understand there is a grace.

So for those of you who perhaps connect with what I’ve been feeling just know there is a grace to face your race, a grace that sets your pace!